Sunday, July 13, 2014

Advice For Broken Relationships-Get A Handle On Your Relationship

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It isn't easy trying to get a handle on a relationship that is on the verge of failure. You, most likely, don't really know what to do, but you are open to any advice for broken relationships that will help you to work things out. Keep in mind that every person and every couple is different, so not all advice will work equally well; however, if it means you can be happy again, then all advice is at least worth trying.

As mentioned, not all advice works for everybody, but it is important that you always consider where the advice is coming from. In other words, you need to ask yourself what makes the person qualified to give you any advice for broken relationships. For example, if they have healed a broken relationship and are now happily back together with that same person, then they have some idea of what they are talking about. On the other hand, if the person has had one failed relationship after another and isn't even in one right now, then they probably aren't the most qualified person to help you.

Where can you get advice? Talk to family members who have been in a similar situation. They have the benefit of personally knowing something about you and your relationship, and can make their advice better fit your situation. Friends can be another source of advice for broken relationships, but you also need to be careful that they don't have ulterior motives. For example, if your best friend feels that your ex stole you away from them, then they may (even at a subconscious level) give you advice that doesn't work. A professional counselor can also give you advice on how best to work things out. The advantage here is that they can view your relationship as an objective observer, and they won't take sides when giving you advice. Again, all of this assumes that any of these people are qualified to give you relationship advice in the first place.

There are also a few things you can do yourself to take the sting out of a broken relationship.

1. Go ahead and grieve. Death isn't the only situation that is associated with the grieving process, break ups also require grieving. Give yourself permission to go through that process and reassure yourself that things will be better on the other side of it.

2. Socialize. You may not feel like it, but you should get out and have a social life. That doesn't mean you have to go out and start dating, not at all, but it does mean that you should go out with friends and do your best to have some fun.

3. Give it time. Whether you plan on moving on with your life or wish to get back together with your ex, you need to give things some time. You need that time to get your emotions in check and to come to terms with what has happened.

4. Things will get better. This bit of advice for broken relationships seems so unbelievable, but it is true. The fact that you are reading this is proof that you believe that things can get better, and that's a good thing.

Joyce Abbey is the Owner of http://HomeBizStars.com. Check us out anytime for marketing tips and a free subscription to our cutting edge newsletter.

 

CALLING ALL WOMEN (GOD WANTS YOU)

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Friday, June 18, 2010

CALLING ALL WOMEN (GOD WANTS YOU)

Proverbs 21:17
You're addicted to thrills? What an empty life! The pursuit of pleasure is never satisfied.

God has put it on my heart to speak about women selling themselves short.  Every where you go now, rather the grocery store, beauty shop, park, etc., you hear women talking about their men and sex.  The sad part is that those that are saved and single Christians are having sex.  I am here to tell all you women that you are selling yourself short when you just lie down and give yourself up like it is nothing.  I can remember when I was young my father would always say to me a man will tell you anything to get what he wants.  He also used to say this quote to me "Why buy the cow when the milk is free".  I learned as I got older that he was telling me that as long as a man can get the milk for free he will never marry you.  You will not be the woman that he brings home to meet his parents.

I was in a beauty shop and listening to a conversation between about three or four women friends.  They were talking about how their men treat them.  How they do everything they can to please him, but nothing works!  He always finds something to be angry about or any way he can to put them down.  Now lets focus on that for a moment.  A man that has no respect for you and is constantly putting you down or taking his fustrations out on you is a man that (1) does not have God in his life  (2) does not have God in his life!  Okay am I making my point.  We women are so afraid of being alone that we go looking in the wrong places for men that are not chosen by God.  You will always have some type of issue when it is not blessed by your heavenly Father.  I can tell you this because I have been seated in the same place that you are now.  I am now remarried and let me share with you how it was before I gave myself to Christ and took a seat in the background and let God do his work.  I was used and thrown away like a piece of trash.  I couldn't in the world figure out what the problem was; since I considered myself to be a good woman.  A woman in my mind that any man would give his right arm to be with. (lol)  Wow!  What a bunch of bull I told myself!  After all the hurt and pain I sat down and evaluated myself.  I asked myself if I truly loved me.  The answer was no, because if I did I would not have allowed myself to be caught up in some of the situations that brought me nothing but pain and regret.  I started praying for answers to my life and what my purpose was for being on this earth.  God started answering and believe me; some of the answers I was not ready to hear nor was I  happy with.  One of the things that God brought to my attention was how can I trust you with one of my Sons if you do not love, respect or honor yourself.  He took me on a journey of reading and opening my mind to new challenges.  At the end of this blog I will recommend some books for you to read.  Women you need a new attitude about YOU!

Have you ever taken into consideration why God said that sex should not before marriage?  Sex is the most intimate part of a relationship between a husband and wife.  God made it that way because when you are single and opening yourself up to every man that you feel that you are in love with, you are opening yourself up to failure.  Have you ever wonder why you act the way you do sometimes?  Let me put something out here for you to think about.  Because sex is the most intimate part of marriage and honored by God it is a beautiful experience shared in love.  When you lie down with someone that you really do not know but think you know you are allowing the spirits of that person and whatever other spirits that he may have picked up by lying down with someone before you to enter the most sacred part of your body.  The part of your body where deep emotions run deep and wide.  Because of this I became celibate until I married my husband from Ghana.  Some of my friends could not understand how I could go without having sex.  When you decide to give your body and life to God he takes control.  You will find that you do not have a desire for what is not good for you.  Don't get me wrong I had the urges, but when I felt that urge I would pray for God to take it away and he always did.  Before I got married I was worried if I would have those intimate feelings for my husband since it had been five or more years without those sexual feelings.  God started preparing me for the day that I would be with my husband.  Those feelings that I felt were loss started reappearing little by little.

Women I want to encourage you to take time to love yourselves and respect you.  Do not leave your happiness up to a man for fulfilling.  Learn to make yourself happy and most of all learn to lean on God for all of  your needs and desires.  If you are looking for a good man!  Then pray to God for the man that you want in your life.  Be specific about the man that you want God to bring to you.  One thing I can tell you is that God will not bring you one of his Sons if you are not prepared to take care of what he brings to you.  He will not trust you with one of his if he can't trust you with yourself.  Stop and become satisfied with you!  If you are not happy with you, then change you!  You have the power through your Father!

I would like to quote text from an author by the name of Ty Adams.  In his chapter Reclaiming Your Body he writes - Jesus introduces the Living Water to this thirsty Samaritan woman and her response was, "Please give me some of that water!"  She knew she needed Jesus.  She said, "I'll never thirst again."  This is a common mentality of many Christians: "as long as I get to Jesus."  Yes, that's true, but look at Jesus response:  Where is your man?  She was ready to get the water, but Jesus asked her about the men in her life.  Understand that Jesus can hook you up with the Water, but if you don't get rid of what's dehydrating you, you will continue to get thirsty.  "Thirsty" means to have a physical condition resulting from an inner need, and all too often that physical condition is a sexual relationship.  He goes on to say that you bond and enter into a convenant with every person that you have sex with .  Through Christ, you will find that you can reclaim the parts that were stolen form you so that you may become whole again.

Love is suppose to be the one thing that destroys all evil thoughts.  God talked about love throughout the Bible - how to love one another, how to love our enemy and most of all learning to love unconditionally.  Learn to love yourself as God loves you "Unconditionally" and you learn to seek only what God has for you.  God only brings you the best!  The man that is chosen by God will be a man that loves God first so that he will know exactly how to love you.  Women learn how to get into the Word of God.  Start reading about the women of the Bible.  They were some awesome women and you can learn a lot from them.

I will continue to update this blog according to Gods will. Stay Blessed,

Joyce Abbey
Sister in Christ

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